todae is the first dae of yr11,
no matter how dashing everyone looks in our new senior white shirts, somethings just not right xD
maybe bcos wer still sooo immature we dont deserve the white shirts, but finally we feel like a famfam speeding towards the same goal. HSC heh Lol
but watver :) 8) soo exciting ive got goals this yr ! bubbbbbies sweetdreams all xoxo
Thursday, January 28, 2010
Sunday, January 24, 2010
respect & frendship change...
I think every decision i make is based either on, duty or pure emoticions im feeling at taht exact moment.
so sometimes i think reallllllllly stupid & ridciluoussssssss ideas & thoughts come up ...
but... ever since ive been back.. it was fun... first 3 daes? but after that.. i got tired & not sick ? but... bored... ? i dunro.. i dont wanna go backwards or forward? but i dont wanna stop and stay where i am either? i just wanna evaporate or erase my memory or something. haha.. how weird right ?
i have a frend,, who i used to respect like crazy, now.. maybe not so much. i dunro why. i realllly dont.
i stil love him the same, but now ... its not the same. I no longer wanna pick up the fone when he calls, no longer wanna text him, no longer wanna set aside time to check up with him.
but that just reminds me, the " spare time i have now " i should give it to God... bcos i never spend time with Him now.. im so ashamed of myself, but excuses come up sooo fast. i thought of sharing it with a leader, heh. but i dont wanna hear the " correct answers " when they give it to me ? like the standard ones, but the ones that will actually touch my heart... and move me along again.. (im gna explodsion sooon ><)
i keep saying to myself " yehhh.. its a downhill, i wont be here forever!" but hey, its making me think noww" omgosh,. maybe i am a fat car thats not getting anywhere after a really steep hill" but maybe its just me PMS-ing.
But hey, thats like my other frend.
i dunro, i used to think i was sooo lucky to have him. bcos he put up with my everything. like, i would alwaes " princess syndrome " him like crazy & hed be that poor guy who'd alwaes kinda go along with my dramatic problems.
But since last yr, was it half yearlies or yearlies.. we kinda drifted, bcos we got too busy... for each other.. & i thought. man i love this guy soo much, we'll never be drifted completely, we'll be best budds as soon as we get time..
well i think we kinda got time at the end of last yr, & i did get off my butt side & KINDA put my " princess syndrome " away for a few momo when we talked again, but it still seemed we wer still very busy. very distraacted.
back in the daes... we used to talk EVERY DAE. haha. where whoever would go online first, wed be liek *ding!* first person to say hi on msn without FAIL !
& we even spent a couple of nights & hours discussing & trying to solve a problem we later found out didnt reallly exsist xP.. awww i missed that..
but now ive come back, & youve changed again, ive learnt to respect you more, but i dont feel that connection animore... it breaks my heart. bcos..... i feel like i havta make an effort to talk to you, not like before when i could rock up and just talk & i didnt care waht you thought. but now, i think i do care. & i dunro why. maybe i am becoming that tiny bit older & wiser.. ( heh i wished )
i know its just me lost in the past & that ill havta get over myself soo incrediblly soon... but i really miss that frendship but i know, i was the one who ruined it.
so sometimes i think reallllllllly stupid & ridciluoussssssss ideas & thoughts come up ...
but... ever since ive been back.. it was fun... first 3 daes? but after that.. i got tired & not sick ? but... bored... ? i dunro.. i dont wanna go backwards or forward? but i dont wanna stop and stay where i am either? i just wanna evaporate or erase my memory or something. haha.. how weird right ?
i have a frend,, who i used to respect like crazy, now.. maybe not so much. i dunro why. i realllly dont.
i stil love him the same, but now ... its not the same. I no longer wanna pick up the fone when he calls, no longer wanna text him, no longer wanna set aside time to check up with him.
but that just reminds me, the " spare time i have now " i should give it to God... bcos i never spend time with Him now.. im so ashamed of myself, but excuses come up sooo fast. i thought of sharing it with a leader, heh. but i dont wanna hear the " correct answers " when they give it to me ? like the standard ones, but the ones that will actually touch my heart... and move me along again.. (im gna explodsion sooon ><)
i keep saying to myself " yehhh.. its a downhill, i wont be here forever!" but hey, its making me think noww" omgosh,. maybe i am a fat car thats not getting anywhere after a really steep hill" but maybe its just me PMS-ing.
But hey, thats like my other frend.
i dunro, i used to think i was sooo lucky to have him. bcos he put up with my everything. like, i would alwaes " princess syndrome " him like crazy & hed be that poor guy who'd alwaes kinda go along with my dramatic problems.
But since last yr, was it half yearlies or yearlies.. we kinda drifted, bcos we got too busy... for each other.. & i thought. man i love this guy soo much, we'll never be drifted completely, we'll be best budds as soon as we get time..
well i think we kinda got time at the end of last yr, & i did get off my butt side & KINDA put my " princess syndrome " away for a few momo when we talked again, but it still seemed we wer still very busy. very distraacted.
back in the daes... we used to talk EVERY DAE. haha. where whoever would go online first, wed be liek *ding!* first person to say hi on msn without FAIL !
& we even spent a couple of nights & hours discussing & trying to solve a problem we later found out didnt reallly exsist xP.. awww i missed that..
but now ive come back, & youve changed again, ive learnt to respect you more, but i dont feel that connection animore... it breaks my heart. bcos..... i feel like i havta make an effort to talk to you, not like before when i could rock up and just talk & i didnt care waht you thought. but now, i think i do care. & i dunro why. maybe i am becoming that tiny bit older & wiser.. ( heh i wished )
i know its just me lost in the past & that ill havta get over myself soo incrediblly soon... but i really miss that frendship but i know, i was the one who ruined it.
Tuesday, January 19, 2010
feel so ... i dunro how to explain.
not quite sad, not quite upset, but sorta pathetic.
todae the subjects of " girls alwaes loves fags first " was brought up. - people were sharing their issues, experiences or watever. and a name kept getting brought up. bcos it was just some random they knew about, and he was known or classified as a " fag " but amongst all the discussion, all i thought about was someone else.
He was everything V sed a fag was.. just he was never a fag to me... so even until now, no matter how many times ive sed i have, i havent really gotten over it.
i really miss it. no matter how many fags have, or may leave footprints in my life? this one seemed to overpower all of them... seemed sooo stupid bcos it all happened when i was younger and it seemed like nothing back them was even considered as serious... but ive noticed every relo/ nearly relo i had ive compared every single one to that one...
so yeh... what is it about a fag that makes him so unforgetable i dunro & now i just feel pathetic, bcos this yr8 girl sharing her story todae? she seems so completely over it & over the situation and back on track & here i am still dragging on after ... 2 yrs
heh. how pathetic right ?
not quite sad, not quite upset, but sorta pathetic.
todae the subjects of " girls alwaes loves fags first " was brought up. - people were sharing their issues, experiences or watever. and a name kept getting brought up. bcos it was just some random they knew about, and he was known or classified as a " fag " but amongst all the discussion, all i thought about was someone else.
He was everything V sed a fag was.. just he was never a fag to me... so even until now, no matter how many times ive sed i have, i havent really gotten over it.
i really miss it. no matter how many fags have, or may leave footprints in my life? this one seemed to overpower all of them... seemed sooo stupid bcos it all happened when i was younger and it seemed like nothing back them was even considered as serious... but ive noticed every relo/ nearly relo i had ive compared every single one to that one...
so yeh... what is it about a fag that makes him so unforgetable i dunro & now i just feel pathetic, bcos this yr8 girl sharing her story todae? she seems so completely over it & over the situation and back on track & here i am still dragging on after ... 2 yrs
heh. how pathetic right ?
Sunday, January 17, 2010
A, MANY KISSES ALL THE WAY TO FRANCE D:
ohemgee im tired.
saw people todae :) *thumbs up* was gonna go to volleyball to see C , but then last minute bbal was cancelled & stuff stuff so i ended up not going, then he ended up going thinking everi1 was going, then it was all a bigfat confusion... hehe anwiaes... and i didnt get to see A...but yeh..
lol
man, p-loser ruined my nite tonite : first thing as soon as we talk : ' we have 10 daes till skool left ! '
omg bro... best warning in the world.. NOT ! im scared to see your face bcos aparently we have the same colour of hair.. and im like: OHMGOSHHH that reminds me of waht happened in yr8...
but thats something i should forget and let go . (hehe)
back to A .... shes going to FRANCE TO DEFERE FOR A YR BCOS SHES OMGOHSHHHH >< btw, shes flying loiek .. TOMORRROW !?
i thought she was still hanging around for her gap yr.. but she thought i knew..
and mannng, i couldve seen her todae if i wasnt so lazy in not going to volleyball ........ *heart cracks*
so yehh... sleepy but too heartbroken to sleep..
too much to take in , in one nite..
aww todae was some1 speshials 21st celebration :) sooo a bigfatshoutout to you ! if your reading this :) , which your prob not, so im just talking to myself *heh*
im sorry if i seemed out of it... or disinterested in moments, i was so exhausted but all mixed altogether and something, i forgot how to react..
todae.. well... K came up to tell me id hate him.. i couldnt think of it.. but i think some1 told me the reason.. not sure if its the right reason but... im disapointed but ... not much to hate.. but still...
"disapointed " is sucha.... hurtful word...
vinhs used it twice on me... the first time bcos of the sleepover incident with looking dead at service.. and the other one tonite :
Cho: " what IF she really does go-out with him "
Vinh: -look at me- " then id be truthfully and truely disapointed "
i know whatever i say wont work ? but i know nothing will happpen, but i guess he still doesnt believe me.
im tired.. but i cant get to sleep so im prob just babbling on, maybe you should stop reading this, bcos its just completely nothing...
saw people todae :) *thumbs up* was gonna go to volleyball to see C , but then last minute bbal was cancelled & stuff stuff so i ended up not going, then he ended up going thinking everi1 was going, then it was all a bigfat confusion... hehe anwiaes... and i didnt get to see A...but yeh..
lol
man, p-loser ruined my nite tonite : first thing as soon as we talk : ' we have 10 daes till skool left ! '
omg bro... best warning in the world.. NOT ! im scared to see your face bcos aparently we have the same colour of hair.. and im like: OHMGOSHHH that reminds me of waht happened in yr8...
but thats something i should forget and let go . (hehe)
back to A .... shes going to FRANCE TO DEFERE FOR A YR BCOS SHES OMGOHSHHHH >< btw, shes flying loiek .. TOMORRROW !?
i thought she was still hanging around for her gap yr.. but she thought i knew..
and mannng, i couldve seen her todae if i wasnt so lazy in not going to volleyball ........ *heart cracks*
so yehh... sleepy but too heartbroken to sleep..
too much to take in , in one nite..
aww todae was some1 speshials 21st celebration :) sooo a bigfatshoutout to you ! if your reading this :) , which your prob not, so im just talking to myself *heh*
im sorry if i seemed out of it... or disinterested in moments, i was so exhausted but all mixed altogether and something, i forgot how to react..
todae.. well... K came up to tell me id hate him.. i couldnt think of it.. but i think some1 told me the reason.. not sure if its the right reason but... im disapointed but ... not much to hate.. but still...
"disapointed " is sucha.... hurtful word...
vinhs used it twice on me... the first time bcos of the sleepover incident with looking dead at service.. and the other one tonite :
Cho: " what IF she really does go-out with him "
Vinh: -look at me- " then id be truthfully and truely disapointed "
i know whatever i say wont work ? but i know nothing will happpen, but i guess he still doesnt believe me.
im tired.. but i cant get to sleep so im prob just babbling on, maybe you should stop reading this, bcos its just completely nothing...
Saturday, January 2, 2010
merry 2o1o
omgosh i have a lot to say... but i dont have much time..
hehe i realised how precious interent was since i went to korea ( seoul ) & hk... lol
ummmm, wow its 2o1o hehh... new new years resolution. i think mine last yr was, to be good and not get into relo problems but i got owned and didnt suceed in 2009 so now ima gna be super mature and make a resolution worth keeping even for longer than a year
" to value family times " i learnt taht ... every single time i see my grandparents my heart aches inside knowing i dont spend enough time or memories with them.. and they have no gurantee that next time i come back theyd still be healthy and well...
i remember an oldie once told me to value the family time for dindin and anithing else with ur famfam bcos... he doesnt get much time to spend to sit down and have dindin with his animore..
and plus with my grandpapas & grandmamas, i dont wanna imagine not having them around.
bcos im lucky to still have all 4 of my grandparents still here :) they have so much love to give to us everysingle time we come back, its heartbreaking to know they WAIT 2 years every single dae just to see us, and here we are cruising along and only remembering them when they send of easter or xmas cards...
sooo, heres a thank you & i loveyou shout out to famfams of all shapes, sizes, ages and types
merry 2010 :)
hehe i realised how precious interent was since i went to korea ( seoul ) & hk... lol
ummmm, wow its 2o1o hehh... new new years resolution. i think mine last yr was, to be good and not get into relo problems but i got owned and didnt suceed in 2009 so now ima gna be super mature and make a resolution worth keeping even for longer than a year
" to value family times " i learnt taht ... every single time i see my grandparents my heart aches inside knowing i dont spend enough time or memories with them.. and they have no gurantee that next time i come back theyd still be healthy and well...
i remember an oldie once told me to value the family time for dindin and anithing else with ur famfam bcos... he doesnt get much time to spend to sit down and have dindin with his animore..
and plus with my grandpapas & grandmamas, i dont wanna imagine not having them around.
bcos im lucky to still have all 4 of my grandparents still here :) they have so much love to give to us everysingle time we come back, its heartbreaking to know they WAIT 2 years every single dae just to see us, and here we are cruising along and only remembering them when they send of easter or xmas cards...
sooo, heres a thank you & i loveyou shout out to famfams of all shapes, sizes, ages and types
merry 2010 :)
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